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The taser he stuffed into his pants accidentally discharged into his groin while he was trying to steal a portrait of Tipper Gore, causing him to suffer a fatal heart attack. Heck of an obituary. 2 weeks ago, he was acting tough on social media ... my vote for this year’s Darwin Award!✧ ✧ ✧GOOGLE Pizza (phone order conversation)Hello! Is this Gordon’s Pizza?No sir – it’s Google Pizza.I must have dialed a wrong number. Sorry.No sir – Google bought Gordon’s Pizza last month.OK. I would like to order a pizza.Do you want your usual, sir?My usual – you know me?According to our caller ID data sheet, the last 12 times you called you ordered an extra-large pizza with three cheeses – sausage – pepperoni – mushrooms and meatballs on a thick crust.OK – that’s what I want.May I suggest that this time you order a pizza with ricotta – arugula – sun-dried tomatoes and olives on a whole wheat, gluten free, thin crust?What? I detest vegetables!Your cholesterol is not good, sir.How the hell do you. She wasn’t looking at me when I was taking her towel. How could she hide her incredible body under any clothing item at all? I was drinking my cocktail looking at her body, admiring it. She was smiling sheepishly. I was smiling too, as there was double whisky in her glass. -Such strange cola… - she said.-It’s dietary. Let me wash you.She was standing in shower, I was standing near her. She gave me the sponge and I began washing her. She was laughing. When I was through with washing her neck and her shoulders and was washing her breasts, I got really aroused. She was enjoying the whole thing too. Her nipples got bigger, and her boobs were looking just marvelous now. I bent down, washing her legs. She raised her long beautiful legs. First right, then left. Her pubis was turning me on. I was washing it with my hand. She arched her back, sticking out her butt. Her body was looking very sexy this way.I must admit her ass had been driving me crazy since the very beginning. I was attracted.
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