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You left these on the floor in the family room last night.”Totally embarrassed, I blurted out, “Mom, trust me there is no way I could have gotten pregnant last night. I wouldn’t do anything without using birth control.”Smiling, she chuckled and asked, “Should I go check for a used condom?”“No, I told you we didn’t do anything like that. Please believe me.”“I believe you, sweetie. Just wanted to make sure. I know perfectly well that there are ways for a man and a woman to physically express their love without intercourse,” she said.“Mom, this is so embarrassing,” I replied.“Nothing to be embarrassed about,” she said. “It’s perfectly natural. I’m relieved to know that you are being responsible. I do ask that the next time you two want to be intimate that you go to your room and close the door,”“Mom, I couldn’t do that,” I retorted, “Daddy would kill the both of us.”“Don’t worry about your father. I’ll take care of him. He’ll understand”“How?” I asked“Easy, I’ll just remind him of what. Just after lunchtime there was a knock at the door, it was Mrs S. She said she was passing and wondered if any of us were at home. Naturally I invited her in and asked if she would like some coffee (remember that cheap powdered instant stuff?) which she accepted. It was October by now and she had an overcoat on which she removed. Underneath she was wearing a cotton housecoat like the ones hotel maids wear. But this was more like the smock things nurses wear with trousers so the hem finished well above her knees. Even better the bottom button was undone so from side on I could see a fine expanse of inner thigh clad in dark tan nylon … mmmm I thought … nice. She asked where the others were and I explained the situation.Have you been keeping up with the cleaning rota she asked? Well sort of, as best we can, I replied. So she started to look around the lounge. Typical lads she said, you’ve missed the edges of the carpet and under the furniture … and look at the dust behind the TV. Sorry.
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