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He was wondering if you had availability tomorrow at four to discuss the applications for your lab." Both Mr. Sterling and I knew the applications for my lab. Meleah Singh, one of Tom's post-doctoral fellows, would love the chance to work with the company and maybe earn a position. This meeting was about Mr. Sterling using her as leverage to talk me into spending a weekend with him. Which, ironically, was a very arousing thought. My stomach knotted. I hated what I was about to do. "I'm sorry," I said in a very low voice. "I'm afraid I'm not free tomorrow afternoon at all." "Would you like for me to see how late he would be willing to meet?" "No, thank you." She waited but I didn't explain further. "Very good, Miss Conway. I'll let him know." Over the weekend, rather than sitting home and moping on my couch, I worked at the lab. Raj made an appearance on Sunday. I showed him where I was on the experimental plan for the pharmaceutics project and we agreed to talk in the morning after I. And I wondered. In a way, we all sit in our own wheelchairs. Most of us find a way to keep going forward no matter how difficult it seems to be, or how difficult others may see it as we struggle on through life. And for some, it’s far harder than that, for some like this man, we do it with one arm, we keep going even though we sometimes lose the comfort of our own hats, and have to stop, retrieve that comfort, that security and find a way to keep going. Maybe he would have appreciated the gesture, my stopping jumping out to help. But I also wondered, how many who sat behind me in their cars would have honked impatiently as I did so. How many others sat there as I did wondering at his determination, or stupidity? Would he have appreciated someone giving him a hand, walking behind, pushing him instead of his doing it himself? Or would he have found annoyance in that? I think that all of us at times appreciate a little push, a little help once in a while. But sometimes, we need to push.
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