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“What in god’s name are you doing here, Maria? Is that Gary trying to hide behind you?” I growled at my colleague and friend. “Don’t you know it’s Friday night when young, randy people are off hitting the Honky-Tonks downtown and getting laid?”“Doc, you have been in such a bad mood all week since your woman went back to Chicago, that we decided that our good deed for the week would be to come out and keep you company!”Even as sour as I was feeling, I had to smile — at least a little bit. This pair of my subs were sacrificing their Friday night pleasure on my behalf. It was actually rather touching.So in they came. We ordered some Thai food for them and I drank a little bourbon and watched and actually enjoyed their company. They were both intelligent and widely read (at least by modern standards) people who could discuss politics, art, music — whatever, and keep me amused.We had a fairly pleasant evening together and I was feeling much better by the end of it.Around 9:00 that evening. What would I be? A blogger? A vlogger? A cunty snogger? An influencer? A demonstrator? A rampant copulator? Maybe even a pop idol, reality TV starlet or Z list celebrity propping up game shows, opening supermarkets and turning on Christmas lights in no-hope towns up and down the country? Well, I just thrummed and throbbed and quivered and pulsated at the thought of all the excitement ahead until I was a writhing, squirming, gooey mess of scrummy-dumptiousness. The one thing I knew I didn't have to worry about was what I was going to wear because the wardrobe of predictability was bound to provide the perfect outfit. So no sooner had my morning alarm gone buzzedy-buzz-buzz-buzz than I hopped out of bed a vision of expectant, wanton, willing teen-angel fleshiness and flung back the wardrobe doors to reveal... nothing.Well, not quite nothing because on the floor was a pair of classic four-inch, black leather, red-soled, stiletto-heeled, Louboutins, because nothing says 'I may be a.
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