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Not all of us have such awesome self-esteem," she said, words dripping sarcasm. "Or lack of modesty."Rather rudely, Jen pointed at a morbidly obese man some distance away. "He's got bigger tits than me. Clearly, neither modesty nor self-esteem is required. Wimp!" Laughing to herself, she pulled her t-shirt over her head, shaking out her hair. "I also know for fact that you don't have any tan lines. Ah-hem," she said, coughing pointedly into a delicate fist."Privacy fences and tree cover," the brunette muttered by way of explanation.Curiously, Jahn asked. "We don't have an umbrella. Why not the hotel pool? More shade, you're less likely to burn." Nudity is not an option there. Besides... ," Jen gave a throaty, borderline obscene laugh and reached below the seat, withdrawing a moment later to show off an industrial-sized bottle of suntan lotion. Hadn't even noticed that, but it explained why she hadn't had any complaints over the last few days. " ... guess who's getting a rubdown?". Schwartz," the mortician> commented, "I can't allow you to be cremated> with such an impressive private part.> It must be saved for posterity."> So, he removed it,> stuffed it into his briefcase,> and took it home> "I have something to show> you won't believe," he said to his wife,> opening his briefcase.> "My God!" the wife exclaimed,> "Schwartz is dead!">>> The 4th Affair>> A woman was in bed with her lover> when she heard her husband> opening the front door.> "Hurry," she said, "stand in the corner;> She rubbed baby oil all over him,> then dusted him with talcum powder.> "Don't move until I tell you,"> she said, " pretend you're a statue."> "What's this?" the husband inquired> as he entered the room.> "Oh it's a statue," she replied,> "the Smiths bought one and I liked it> so I got one for us, too."> No more was said,> not even when they went to bed.> Around 2 AM the husband got up,> went to the kitchen and returned> with a sandwich and a beer.> "Here," he said to the statue, have.
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