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Caution is advised.1. I got invited to a party and was told to dress to kill. Apparently a turban, beard, and a backpack wasn't what they had in mind.2. After a night of drink, drugs and wild sex, Rick woke up to find himself next to a really ugly woman. That's when he realized he had made it home safely.3. Seven wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after they tested positive for WD40.4. "IT'S A BOY" I shouted, "A BOY, I DON'T BELIEVE IT, ITS A BOY". And with tears streaming down Tom's face he swore he'd never visit another Thai Brothel.5. Sailing results are in, GB took gold, USA took silver. and Somalia took a Middle aged couple from Duluth.6. A boy asks his granny, "Have you seen my pills, they were labeled LSD?"Granny replies, "Fuck the pills, have you seen the dragons in the kitchen?"7. Wife gets naked and asks hubby, "What turns you on more, my pretty face or my sexy body?"Hubby looks her up and down and replies, "Your sense of humor!"8. The wife's back on. I knew I was pretty, I just had to make him believe I was irresistible. Walking on my 4 inch red stilettos, I roamed farther into the house, away from my prize. What guy could walk away from something just out of their reach? And more to that point, I glimpsed back slightly, and there he was slowly making his way though the rutting bodies, walking in my direction. Good I had caught his eye, now how to keep it for the rest of the party? With that in mind, I unclasped my bra, shimmied out of it before throwing it perfectly that it found its mark on the man's chest. He picked it up, looking at what size it was to see what was being offered. Noting a C cup, he looked up to focus on my uncovered tits, sadly he was not quite so lucky. My blond hair swirled over my breasts, only allowing the slight peek at its bounty as I walked with a sway in my hips. Seeing as I was in a kitchen, I went to find the wine rack. By-passing the couple doggie styling it on the table, I found a well.
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