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I walked into the lounge and she was sitting on the couch with a face as long as a fortnight, her face in her hand staring at the television, I sat beside her “is there a problem” I said, trying to sound sympathetic, she glared at me with tear filled eyes ”I hope you two had a good fucking time on Sunday” she blurted throwing Gillian’s bra at me which she had found under the cushion of the couch whilst cleaning, I thought there is no point in beating about the bush, this has got to stop, it is getting out of hand and my secret fear was that she would explode in front of Gillian and her mother and then it would all come out” would you like me to leave” I asked, “No! stay there” she pouted, “you don’t understand, you are the nearest thing I have to a husband or a boyfriend as I don’t really have either and my love for you is so strong that it hurts me to see you screwing Ruth but at least I am watching and taking part but I don’t know how you are with Gillian or how you do it with her. 2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine.3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.4. Splash a little watered down rusty red paint on the sidewalk.5. Leave a note on your door that reads:"Bubba,Bertha, Duke, Slim, & I went for more ammo and beer. Be back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls; they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up bad. I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell from all the blood.Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.Better wait outside. Be right back.Cooter"These are compliments of Larry--A farmer had 3 lovely daughters, all who had dates on Friday night. One by one the local boys came by to pick them up.The first boy arrived and said: "Hi, I'm Eddie, I'm here for Betty, we're going steady, is she ready?"The farmer called Betty and she and Eddie went on their way.The second boy arrived and said: "Hi, I'm Joe, I'm here for Flo, we're going to the show, is she ready to.
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