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I begin to look a lot like the pussy in the painting. "Steel not zere!" he declares, casting his critical eye back and forth between my dripping sex and the masterpiece. He yanks out his French stick, and plunges it deep inside me. He pumps me like a man lost in the desert with nothing to live on but potato chips suddenly finding a well at an oasis. When he spurts inside me (don't forget to wear your diaphragm in Paris) and pulls out hastily, he gazes again at my vagina and at the one in the painting. "Madame," he concedes with a bow, "you are correct."From the Louvre, stroll through the Jardin des Tuileries (zhar-dan day twee-le-ree) and onto the Champs Elysees (shons ay-lee-say), remembering to tug your skirt down every few steps - or if necessary, pull your stockings up. Stop for a late lunch at any one of the myriad bistros and cafes along the way. I've found that if you let the surly French waiters know that it's okay to touch your breasts, they usually lose the attitude, and. He just tried to hit on me and ask me for a date. I knew then that even if I could tell him... if I could tell any of them and get them to believe me... it would never be the same. Never.I'm sorry about all of the smudges on this letter and hope that they don't make it too hard to read. I accidentally got a bunch of tears on it while writing. They come out so much easier now...I tried to get used to what had happened to me, but I couldn't. So you sent me to see that shrink, the one who was supposed to make me accept it. She tried... and so did I, but it just wasn't working. I know that I smiled and said that I was getting used to it... but I lied.My friends are gone, all thinking that I'm dead in a car crash because that's what you told them. I've tried making new friends at my school, but I just couldn't. To all of the guys, I'm just a girl to ask out or try to sleep with. And even though you made me look like them, I don't fit in with the girls. I don't feel right with them. I.
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