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..The jingle changed, indicating the call had been answered..Mike appeared on the screen...looking...well... like Mike. Why did I feelso disappointed? Why did I feel so let down that Mike still looked like aman? Just wearing a regular t-shirt? He looked cute of course, but Iguess I was expecting something else..dare I say it..?"Hi honey!" He looked shy suddenly, I could see him searching for cluesto how I was feeling just like I was doing... the distance between us,the cold computer image of our faces rendered through electronics andsoftware, limiting our ability to touch and feel, to completely senseeach other's feelings and desires.Of course...he was wondering how I was feeling just as much as I was. Hewas feeling as apprehensive as I was. Afterall, what a huge step it was..what we did yesterday...how many couples would have done what we haddone, to exchange underwear while making love in that way, to reverse andcompletely turn all our internal instincts upside down, to. Carefully I pressed the petals between two books, I wondered to myself why people insist on doing this, how could a person’s life be remembered by a dead, dried out flower? I poured myself a hit of whiskey and flipped on the TV, not to watch, but to drown out the deafening roar of silence. After a few more shots, I fell into a restless and troubled slumber. I dreamt of her, her hair as white as the snow which covered her grave. Her smile, always warm and welcoming, the look she always had in her brown eyes, a look of knowing things which others did not, and sometimes, she did. Her voice and her scent haunted me, I wondered if I had done right by her. Would she have liked the funeral? Was the minister the one she would have picked? What about the flowers, the music, her funeral dress, was she satisfied? Did I do the right thing by following her wishes and allowing her to die? Maybe I could have done something more, but in the end there was no more to be done, me a simple human.
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