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"There was only one way to make him understand how I felt, but thatwould have to be tempered by glaring facts that he couldn't refute, sowith nothing more to lose, I dove right in, hoping he would listen."Dad? If I'm doing everything you expect from me, then why can't I dothis? I mean, it doesn't hurt anyone, and like you just said, I alwaystake care of the house and stuff, so why not? I mean, you treat mealmost like a wife! I do the laundry, I make the dinners, I clean thehouse, I buy the groceries, and that's on top of my homework! Hell, I'malmost there now! I know that I'm not very pretty, but why can't I atleast try to look the part as well?"Dad sat there silently staring at me, his eyes getting narrow, thengrowing wider as he thought about what I had said, except that he knewI was right. The very last thing I needed was for him to get entrenchedin his anger, which would certainly lead to my being forced to complywith his wishes. I didn't know what to say, so I sat there right. The result has been a certain amount of grief from my wife and twenty-something daughter, who have both teased and taunted me about getting my back waxed for several years. Needless to say, this has been a notion that I never considered seriously, a complete non-starter. To be honest, I have always considered my hairy chest to be a manly attribute. My wife tells me that she enjoys my chest hair, and her only complaint is that when she rests her face on my bare chest, it tickles her nose.So what, you might ask, led me to the idea of getting my chest waxed?The proximate cause was an episode of 'Dancing with the Stars.' My wife LOVES the show and faithfully watches it every night when it is on. During one season, Heather Mills (the former Mrs. Paul M. of Beatles fame, ) was one of the "stars" — celebrities really — dancing on the show. In that particular episode, Ms. Mills had her male dance partner get his chest waxed in order to wear a costume that was open in the front from his neck.
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