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.." It's okay, I understand," I said.She leaned down and kissed my cheek, said, "Thank you very much," and walked down the sidewalk. There was a big empty feeling in the pit of my stomach as I watched her get into a car.Over the next few hours, I thought a lot about our encounter. I was fairly pretty, at least to some people, but she was very popular and pretty. I was young, barely turned twenty-one, and I knew she was older. I couldn't compete in a monetary sense; she probably earned three times what I did. Her sexual experience almost certainly outweighed mine by a factor of ten, and I saw no reason to think she'd be attracted to me. Still, seeing her nude had sharpened my fantasies.I could relate to the anguish of loss, too, if that's why she'd been crying, and to the anger and frustration that follows. I'd lost Danielle back in high school, and in some ways I hadn't healed completely. My other relationships had been short and occasionally sexually satisfying, but all of them left. He was menacing to anyone who had a reason to fear him, but with people he liked, he was unwaveringly devoted and kind. We both shared my mom's coloring--olive skin with dark eyes and hair--but he was big and square, with a strong and athletic build, while I was petite, thin and small-breasted like our mom. And though I didn't subscribe to the traditional view of women as the weaker sex, when I was with Jack, I loved how small and weak I felt next to his strength. I loved knowing I was safe and loved."Are you staying long?" I asked once introductions had been made and we'd moved into the living room, my roommates following along with interest, no doubt checking out his tight ass. "Please don't tell me you're only here for a night." Well," he said, looking sheepish. I punched his arm, scowling, and felt the hardness of his muscle against my fist. He flinched, though it was just playing along; I had no strength in my punch. "I'm going upstate tomorrow." I deepened my scowl.
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