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. We went to breakfast at a restaurant where the “seniors’ special” was two eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast for $1.99.“Sounds good,” my wife said. “But I don’t want the eggs.”“Then I’ll have to charge you two dollars and forty-nine cents because you’re ordering a la carte,” the waitress warned her.“You mean I’d have to pay for not taking the eggs?” My wife asked incredulously. “I’ll take the special.”“How do you want your eggs?”“Raw and in the shell,” my wife replied. She took the two eggs home.DON’T MESS WITH SENIORS...A father walks into a bookstore with his young son. The boy is holding a quarter. Suddenly, the boy starts choking, going blue in the face. The father realizes the boy has swallowed the quarter and starts panicking, shouting for help.A well dressed, attractive and serious looking woman, in a blue business suit is sitting at a coffee bar reading a newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee.At the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her coffee cup down, neatly folds. What’s it like in the South? I imagine it’s all sunny beaches that you vacation on in the winter, isn’t it G2? Pretty girls in bikinis bringing you wine with a little umbrella in it. How I envy you traveling around. I can’t move from my spot, I tell you. Wouldn’t last a day if I had to find a new place to sleep every night. And my customers—what would they do? If I wasn’t here for them, they’d be in an awful fix. I figure this stool is where I live my life and this stool is where I’ll die one day.” G2 liked Granny Sal. She never expected him to say anything. She made up all the stories about him that she told and he believed her. Yes, he would head south for the winter and sit on fine sunny beaches in Florida. Maybe he would just go all the way out the end of Key West and then dive right into the ocean and swim to Cuba. He could get on a cruise ship as a porter and go on down to Rio in South America. All he had to do was listen to Granny Sal.“I have something for you, G2,” she said..
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