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Laying there in the dark soothing her brother she stewed. She considered getting one of Billy's baseball bats and beating him senseless, she even considered beating him to death, but knew deep down that her mother was somehow addicted to the abusive fucker. There had to be another way.She heard one last loud grunt from the drunken asshole that was her dad and knew that he was done. If he held true to form he'd be passed out again in a minute or two so she waited for his freight train like snoring to begin before crawling out of Billy's bed and padding down the hall to her own. It was late, but sleep would not come as plan after plan to get rid of her drunken father played out in her mind. Quickly, she saw the flaws in each plan and discarded them, only to imagine a new one. As she lay there in the dark thinking of everything that had happened that night, Emmett, Billy, her mom, and particularly her father it occurred to her. She knew exactly what to do.Connie spent much of the next. ..I am not like other people – I don't need or want to live like a normal human... I should be treated like a toy, a walking, talking (if you desire it), moving willing sex slave and the most atrocious things in the name of sex should be done to me at all times. I don't need or want clothes, I need and want only pain, abuse, humiliation, degradation and ultimately violent beautiful death' ?.can you understand ?Can you understand that when I was younger, I would draw on my tummy a mark for where I wanted the blade to go ? Always the same place, just a few inches up from my clit... I would take a knife to bed to play with myself, pretend it was really happening, sometimes getting so carried away I would cut myself.... those orgasms were the most powerful !Can you understand that I liked to imagine I might be kidnapped, taken away and killed ? That it might happen on holiday somewhere, a foreign place, and I would never be found ? I would be sold to a wealthy buyer, kept for a while and.
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