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One afternoon Roger was down at his potting shed in just his shorts as was a normal occurrence, he gave up wearing underwear after his wife died, saved on washing apparently. The radio was on in the background when Ollie came through the adjoining gate, obviously his dress code had rubbed off on him although Rogers shorts weren’t quite as short as Ollies, youth of today!.“What’s up Ollie?” Roger asked pleased of the company, “Hi Uncle Rog, Ella was going to wash mum’s car, you want yours done?” he asked and Roger was happy to bung her a few quid, “Maybe she can hoover it out too?” he joked as Ollie disappeared to tell his sister.He soon reappeared and they chatted for a while mostly about football but then the subject of how his sister was dressed raised it’s head, Roger remembered the lad telling him he was full of testosterone and when he told him that she was wearing a pair of tight yoga shorts and crop top he gained Rogers attention,“Really? Are you k**ding me?” he exclaimed with. She giggled. "God! I haven't heard it called that for many a year. Moreover, you said it as if you were born to it. Are you from the area?" Yes. I was born in Upminster. I grew up speaking Estuary English. I knew Southend quite well. I had many a day trip there." I haven't been back to Sarfend for years." She used the local dialect. "The last time was when I played the Cliffs Pavilion at Westcliff." She lifted her glass to me. "Cheers." I did the same. "You obviously remember the long hair. I had it cut years ago. It took hours to keep it in good condition. So when I perform now, it is a wig." She laughed. "Please keep that secret." I crossed my heart but didn't hope to die. "What do you remember about Southend?"I thought for a moment. "Lots of things really. The pier of course." Southend boasted that its pier was the longest in the world, or was it just the longest in Britain. I can never remember. "And that vast expanse of sticky grey mud when the tide went out. I always thought.
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