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The kids settled Claire's affairs; I wasn't capable. Eventually though I had to try and have some sort of life, even if it was without her. That's how I ended up as a troll.Yes, a troll. You know the kind. Lives under a bridge. Grumpy. Doesn't want company. A long time ago, I read a series of essays called Magic Harbor1, by a fellow named Don Berry. In one of the essays, he described himself as a troll. I find myself in a very similar physical and emotional situation. I live on my boat, not under a bridge - that doesn't work well with a real mast - and without the light in my life. I really don't want to interact with anybody and I don't even think about finding someone new. No one could take her place in my heart; it had been torn out when she died.Things have been odd lately. I would be puttering around, doing minor maintenance stuff, and have to go to the head. So, I'd put down whatever tool I was using, or whatever small item I was working on, to go take care of business. When I. It's not like you tried to hurt me, is it?" Some of these lines I had rehearsed the night before."No, of course not, and I love you more than ever," she said turning round, to look me in the eye. Her eyes had welled up but she was not properly crying. "You can sleep with anyone you like, I'm so sorry." I don't want anyone else, but if a threesome with twins is on offer in the future, I won't refuse," I joked. I kissed her softly on the forehead and pulled her tight again. "So how did it all go so wrong?" I whispered sarcastically into her ear."Well, we did go clubbing but it wasn't that great and we left at about 2am. Nothing happened until he hailed a taxi and asked if I wanted to come back to his place until the trains started running," she explained. "I didn't have much time to think about it but I wasn't tired and so I got in the cab. Then we were kissing in the back seat, God how cheesy!" Weren't you flirting before then? At the club?" I asked."Not really. We were having a nice.
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