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As it happens, the English have been making sausages way longer than the Germans, and as anyone who knows me will tell you, I love sausages. (I know what you're thinking and if you so much as fucking smirk, I swear I'm going reach out and slap the shit out of you.)Right, so I was dithering between the Toad in the Hole and the Bubble and Squeak when I was greeted by a curvaceous woman in a bright red 'Mrs Santa' outfit. She was a round woman, Rubenesqu even, as a friend would later say. I didn't know about that. I thought a Ruben was a sandwich, but what the hell. I prefer a woman who can appreciate a good hoagie anyway. Specks of red and green were sprinkled from her rosy cheeks all the way down over her very impressive breasts. She looked like a glitter-bomb had exploded over her.I just sat there, mesmerized by the plastic stardust covering her tits. Every time she moved, her wonderful mounds jiggled, causing the glitter to sparkle under the ancient, yellow lights. I couldn't take. .. it's tax paid. How much rain were you planing on us saving for? The Bank is paying 5% on Savings. 5% of one million is 50 thousand a year. A line worker at Oldsmobile typically makes 45 dollars a week."College educated white collar jobs typically pay between seventy five hundred and twenty thousand a year ... before taxes. Even at 5%, David and I will have a joint income of two hundred thousand a year. The President of the United States doesn't make that much. Let's live a little, besides, I want to transform Vera, and David really could use a new suit ... or two or three or six."We went to downtown Lansing. Everywhere we went, Wendy asked for the owner or manager ... they all knew her. She was, after all, a downtown fixture. Seen everywhere, knowing everyone, and they all liked her ... a better behaved young lady did not exist in Lansing. She showed The Check, managers called Medawar, hung up and beamed, "Yes. You may. 90 days same as cash."We spent like drunken sailors in port.
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