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I became empowered and in charge of my life. It was as if panties and heels, cute girl next door dresses and sultry and sexy lingerie gave me a sense of empowerment.I also had Steve with me the entire way. He became in a way my charge. From that first moment that he saw me in full dress to this very moment, he was there for me. He cared for me and has even told me that he loved me. I have a man who told me that he loved me.I cared for Steve, and despite my indiscretion with Josh, I cared for him deeply. I wanted to say I loved him but either fear of rejection again or something else that held me back from saying that I loved him.One night, after another amazing night of watching movies and amazing sex, he popped the question. It was sweet how he did it. While I'm nestled in his broad chest, him stroking my hair, he told me of everything he was feeling. How he was deeply in love with me. How he saw a future with me, with us. Then he pulled out the ring.It was perfect. Small and dainty. She sometimes would even point out a woman and ask if I thought she was pretty. She wanted to understand what it was that attracted me, to know me better, not to pretend I was something I wasn't.I told Megan about this Goddess. She could tell that I had really appreciated this girl. "Do you know her name?" she asked."Nope, I don't think I'll ask. Tell you the truth; I'd be afraid to ask. Afraid that I might actually do something stupid."Megan looked at me quite thoughtfully. "Oh," she said. She went to prepare dinner and I helped. That was the last of the conversation about the girl.That night in bed, Megan was a little distracted. I knew that it was about the girl at Starbucks. So I brought up the topic. The first thing Megan asked me was, "Are you in love with her?" What? Of course not. Maybe lust but not love," I said laughing."That's supposed to make me feel better," she said.I could tell this was one of those things that just can't be communicated across the gender gap. She.
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