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As I was getting ready to get into bed, I was planning on just stripping to my boxers, but I caught her watching me darkly.I tossed the boxers in the chair and climbed into bed. She still had her T-shirt on, but that wasn’t my problem.We just lay there in the dark, listening to the buzz of the shitty motel room clock for a while. She turned away and I heard a muffled. “Thank you.”I turned toward her and dropped an arm over her. “For what?”“For trying not to...” She stopped for a second. “That’s the worst fucking part, you know. The fucking pity. The little hospice nurses trying to be so nice to the ‘sweet little old lady’ is bad enough, But the pity makes me want to throw up.”She shivered a little and I pulled her closer.I don’t know whether she was talking to me or the dark when she went on. “They don’t know shit. Little college girls. Think I’m a funny old lady with a bunch of silly fucking stories.” She shuddered in revulsion. “I don’t want to die that way, Ice. Not strapped in bed. She clearly had given off very different signals as a mature woman. I had missed this. Had it been developing for a long time or only after her first time with Simon a few months ago?I was sure that Maggie could only have sex when she had an emotional attachment to someone. Did this mean that Maggie would keep searching for satisfaction until she fell in love with someone? Did this mean that our relationship was doomed? Would I never be able to find a way to stay with Maggie while finding a way for her to have sexual fulfilment? Before this journey, I had been more troubled by my sexual fulfilment. Once again, the irony struck me.I needed a plan, any plan, to find a way through. I didn’t think I could manage to work anything out tonight. I needed to spend more time reflecting on this rather than trying to come up with a plan when I was tired and when I had only just learned these new things about Maggie’s past.Unable to sleep, I started looking at the Internet on my laptop. I didn’t.
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