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..Net result: zip, zero, goose, zilch, butkus, nada. I was completely,ridiculously, absurdly healthy. My blood pressure was steady as a rock atone-ten over seventy. My active pulse (after the stair-step warm-up)'raced' at eighty beats per minute. Cholesterol? Hah! No migraines,tumors, arterial plaque, chemical or hormonal imbalances, aneurisms,infections, diseases, kidney, pancreatic or gall stones, not so much as ahang nail. Rather than being relieved, my loving wife became more and more concernedwith each new negative result."There has to be something," Joanna insisted, as we reviewed the findingswhile seated on our living room sofa. "I know the man I married is not ahypochondriac. Yet, all the tests indicate there is nothing physicallywrong with you."Call me a rocket scientist (I'm not, but my mama didn't raise no dummy,either). I could see the direction this conversation was taking. What arethe five dreaded words no man wants to hear in the course of arelationship? No, I don't. John proved to be everything Teresa had promised. He was probably ten years older than either of us, tall, grey-haired, clean-shaven with honest blue eyes. He wore what looked like his best casual outfit: dark blazer and pressed grey slacks, white shirt, no tie. He shook my hand firmly but with no air of presumption or forwardness: a manifestation of the courtesy that Teresa said was typical of the Helping Hands generation. When, though, I lowered my gaze and looked closely, I thought I could detect a telltale bulge. Maybe my imagination, or maybe John's quiet manner concealed a need as pronounced as my own.Teresa, ever the gracious hostess, dealt easily with a slight awkwardness that had followed the introductions. "Now, darlings, no-one has to be shy here. We all want the same thing and I don't see any reason to put it off. I think the bedroom is indicated."Interestingly, John led the way and, once there, enquired politely if he could use a coat hanger. His voice was soft with just.
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