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Let’s be clear, I love sex. My lover … isn’t that a great word? So much better than ‘partner,’ don’t you think? My lover and I rejoice in regular and intense sex together. There’s just one thing.He pressures me. No, not to beat me or force me into a threesome, although the latter does have some appeal; he wants me to watch porn with him. It just has no appeal for me. Why watch plastic models with inflatable boobs get fucked by burly men covered in rather ghastly tattoos?I held out for a long time, but one night he persuaded me to try a little amateur porn – normal people doing normal things to each other – while we make out. “Just zone out if you don’t like it,” he said.Well, it was quite a surprise; no plastic models, not burly men, and certainly no tattoos.Having agreed to try it out, we went up to our room and took our time working up to the main event. There was a definite frisson in the air, and I was fairly wound up by the time he wrapped his arms around me and undid. He hated Swaile and because of his sufferings had learned to hate the other children in his class. He had no friends, nobody wanted to associate with the class idiot, they felt uncomfortable in his presence. During the lessons Wellings’ mind would often wander, he would imagine he was somewhere else, anywhere else but in that dreadful classroom. He remembered the days before school and the hateful lessons, he remembered how free he had felt, then there had been no weight upon his soul, no worries or fears which gnawed at his mind during waking hours and asleep. It was a stifling feeling, almost of suffocation within that classroom, it was only his daydreams that stopped him breaking down during the lessons. Many times he had felt the impulse to breakdown and cry during one of Swaile’s onslaughts but so far he had succeeded in fighting this urge. Everyday the pressures built upon him, every hour in the presence of Swaile made him feel less worthy, less human. It was indescribable.
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