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Helmut loves me - no,Helmut *adores* me. The way he looks at me, his caresses, how consideratea lover he is, the man is totally smitten. Being the object of all that,even if you don't return those feelings, is a heady thing and I can'thelp feeling guilty that this love affair is such a one-sided thing, thatI'm deceiving him. I'm doing so for the best of reasons, in service of mycountry, but knowing that doesn't help. As my guilt grew so I discoveredI could assuage it with sex, that while I got no pleasure from itdirectly it made me happy knowing I was giving Helmut pleasure. Should Ibe worried I feel this way, I wonder? My situation gets ever moreconfusing to me, with no light yet visible at the end of the tunnel.Lying in Helmut's arms afterwards, watching his chest rise and fall as heslept, I fingered my engagement ring thoughtfully, trying to imagine howthis would all end.And who I would I be when it did. ********************** To. I held them to my face inhaling the evidence that it had been good for her, too. ********************************************** Half-an-hour later we were in the shower together. Usually, this was how we cooled down after a steamy escapade. But not this time. I was watching soapy water run off Mel’s tits when she said, “I know it’s not long since – but, I mean, could you do me again? Now?” When I hesitated momentarily, she went on, “I can suck you if that would help.” But already we knew it wouldn’t be necessary. Her hand was on my cock and it was getting harder by the second. Needing no further encouragement, she turned to face the wall, braced herself with both arms and widened her legs. The water sprayed over us as I bent a little at the knees for position, took my cock in my hand, stroked it a few times unnecessarily and then probed. Whether she was still wet from earlier or freshly aroused, I couldn’t tell but entry wasn’t a problem. Mel pushed back, I gave her what she wanted..
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