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8. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal.9. I don't approve of political jokes, I've seen too many of them get elected.10. There are two sides to every divorce, his and the shithead bitch's - opps I mean witch's.11. I love being married, it's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.12. I am a nobody and nobody is perfect, therefore, I am perfect.13. Every day I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've stayed alive.14. How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America???15. Having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing section in a swimming pool.16. Why is it that most nudists are people you don't want to see naked.17. Snowmen fall from Heaven unassembled.18. Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words, "Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been."19. A good friend will come and bail you out of jail, a true friend. " But she is only fourteen years old and from an inferior side of the family." Maybe James would like to train her while she is still young enough, "said Dolly.Denise appeared shocked at the suggestion.Dolly smiled and said, "The winner of this deal gets my personal property, this house, the surrounding forest land and an annuity worth 5000 pounds a year when I die. I hope you are not thinking that a fourteen-year-old with inferior prospects you just referred to would turn this down without getting murdered by her parents. Of course, if you would rather remain single or find a nice fop on your own, you can refuse. I re-emphasize that I have not mentioned any of this to James. He would, unless I miss my guess, refuse to even consider you as a possible wife without a complete bed-check."Later that afternoon, James was called into the parlor to attend Lady Bishop. She briefly explained her proposal of his marriage to Denise and the fact that she was pregnant. James was surprised to say.
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