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I knew that Beatrice somehow wanted to make a point by telling me to wear her nightdress, but I had no clue why. I rolled over to see her watching me. She was wide awake, looking as beautiful as ever with her light green eyes and long blonde hair, but her pretty mouth wasn’t smiling. Instead, she had that same determined look like the previous night. “You do know why you’re wearing that, don’t you?” she asked solemnly. “Not really,” I answered honestly, “Something to do with last night?” “Everything to do with last night.” “I’m sorry.” “Are you a sissy boy?” “No!” “I think you are a sissy boy, John. I think you like to get off while wearing girls’ clothing.” “No…” I started to say, trying to think of an appropriate excuse. “Somebody enjoys it,” she said, smiling at last and holding my swollen shaft through the cotton. She got up on her knees and lifted the nightdress, straddled me and pushed the tip of my cock inside her pussy. I lay there watching her in awe while she bounced around. I hope you are OK. I hope that I am at least a passing thought in your day to day life now. I hope you remember the things we talked about. I hope that someday we can still be friends. Each day I think. Each day I cry. I cry for the love I had to give up. I cry for the longing I have in my heart. I cry for the future that holds no joy for me. I cry and I wonder how I can go on feeling this way, lost and alone. I cry, with the knowing that I am lost, confused and alone. Each day I cry. Each day I worry. I worry that I can and will not make it. That I will attempt something irrational. That I will give in and surrender to my sorrow, my pain, my sadness. To take the cowards way out, the easy way out, the wrong way out. To write off a world that can be a beautiful place to be. So I worry and hope it never comes to this. I do not wish to contemplate otherwise. The alternative is not pleasant. The alternative is to not go on at all. Each day I worry. Each day I do it. I do it again and.
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