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"Es tan agradable verle otra vez." Senorita Scarlett," the gray-haired housekeeper beamed back. "Me complace tanto verle." This is my friend, Alice," Scarlett said switching back to English as they stepped inside. "She will be staying with us for a few days. Would you be so kind as to make up one of the guest rooms for her?" Of course, Senorita," came the reply in English as well as she quickly moved to do just that."You speak Spanish?" Alice asked."Yes, and French too," Scarlett replied as they walked into the living room."You're kidding?" Ce bruit comme je badine?" the redhead said."I don't have any idea what you said, but I'm impressed," Alice said as she looked about the beautifully decorated room. "I couldn't manage bilingual, much less trilingual. That must be some college you're going to." My family has extensive business holdings on the island of San Cristobal in the Caribbean," Scarlett explained. "More people there speak Spanish or French than English. It's become a sort of. Inside the sumptious Nixon Bathroom, larger than most D.C. apartments,President George Walker Bush had donned his pink tutu, his Miss Piggymask and his Farrah Faucett wig. He spoke in a regal, constrictedfalsetto, "Helleeew, yes! I am Princess of thee entire Ew-nee-verse, anda pretty, pretty peeg am I! Oh my!"On tiptoes he fluttered gracefully across the room, his wrists crossed above his head, enamored of the reflections he saw in the room's many tall mirrors. The pig face, the tutu, the ballet slippers and snow whitestockings, the pink ribbon tied around his dangling pecker in a lovelybow- he was indeed a vision of unsurpassed beauty!Now came the fun part. From a wire cage on the sink counter he plucked alarge white gerbil, holding the poor squirming animal by its stubbytail,"Ya know what happens now, my little friend-"The gerbil spoke, "Mister President, I am a magic gerbil. If you don'tput me up your ass I will grant you three wishes!" Huh?" asked the President crossly. .
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