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”“Yes.” This was Daroo, hunting for a mate. That story must have been from around here. The other story was from the Murray-Darling.Along time ago a platypus was in the river hunting fish. Suddenly he saw a shoal of codfish. The codfish tried to swim away, but the platypus gulped down six or so.The rest swam to safety to make a plan for they were frightened. They thought that if they stuck two flat rocks near his mouth he would only eat small fish. Meanwhile the platypus was still hunting. The codfish sneaked up. First they tried to scare him. It didn’t work so they told him to stop and just escaped. They tried their special plan.They found two flat smooth rocks. They held them ready to stick them in.When the platypus came up to eat them they rushed forward and stuck them on top of each other near the platypus’s mouth. That is how the platypus got its bill.Also an explain, but from an inland area where there were Murray cod.“Hello, dear. Annoying the gentleman?” It was an older. I shouted - "Where you off to Charlie?"He said, "I'm off to change a light bulb."Well I just cracked up, couldn't stop laughing, then said,"That's gonna be a bit awkward init?" Not really." he said. "I still have the receipt, you insensitive bastard."I've accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles.My next crap could spell disaster.Went out last night and got really wasted.I woke up this morning next to a fat old bird who was snoring and farting ... so, at least I got home OK.The wife's back on the warpath again.She was up for making a home video last night and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part.Angela Merkel arrives at Passport Control in Athens airport."Nationality?" asks the immigration officer."German," she replies."Occupation?"No, just here for a few days."As the coffin was being lowered into the ground at a Parking Officer's funeral, a voice from inside screams:"I'm not dead, I'm not dead. Let me out!"The Vicar smiles, leans forward, sucking air through.
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